Posted in chronic pain, disability, health, life, urgent

10/11: Tool Junkie

I admit, I’m a Tool Whore. I love me some time in a hardware store, baby. I’m more comfortable in a hardware store than a nice dress shop.

I’ve made it known in the past that I do stuff via a website/app for folks to hire people like me to come and do things like assemble furniture or clean (not one of my offerings, mind you). My hand tools come with me to every furniture gig. More and more, I find I also need to bring things like L brackets and such to fix goofs by either the client or -if they purchased it second hand- the hand-handed disassembly of the previous owner. I have bits and pieces from IKEA and hardware stores, ready to fix whatever may come up.

The problem is that that shit gets HEAVY. One thing I’ve also mentioned is that I have a multitude of injuries from over the years. My back being the worst (other than the cluster headaches, but those are less common). I walk with a cane while out and about because I know something will start hurting. It just does. So, carrying a heavy tool box is getting harder and harder. Sometimes, if I know exactly what to bring and don’t need the supplies, I can keep it light. The strain on my back has become more and more noticeable and painful. To the point where today, I had to switch my cane to my left hand for a while because the pain in my right low back was so excruciating. I then switched back a couple blocks later because then my left hip/low back was griping at me.

Despite my injuries, I enjoy the task of furniture assembly. I’m GOOD at it. I get a lot of really great reviews from clients. I can’t do it all day every day… but I love doing it, regardless.

So, I’m eyeing wheeled tool boxes. I’ve picked one potential out on Amazon. I put it on my wishlist, but it’s more than I really can/want to spend ($55). At first, I was thinking one of those collapsible crate thingies on wheels… but then I’d still need closed things that can fit in it and I’m not sure my tool box will fit… and I KNOW the container with the hardware from IKEA won’t.

Just a handy little tip for my fellow IKEA lovers: Go to the as-is section and look for the little round spinny rack. There are taped up bags of loose hardware and things like dowels for $5 a bag. Get a couple of those and you’ll spare people like me the mess of trying to find parts to help you fix things.

I’ve also added their cheaper single piece rolling caddy… I like the separated elements of the pricier one… but either would do… at least for now.

Do I collect other things? Hmm, do penguins, fabric, sewing supplies, crafting supplies, and art supplies count? Yeah… silly question…

~A

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Posted in crowdfunding, emergency, eviction, friends, homeless, life, Personal, storage, urgent

9/21: #crowdfunding at (almost) 8am

Still holding at $276 needed. (The pic above is Jack back in Chicago.)

*There looks to be a chance… I’ll post when it’s confirmed.*

I’d rather have my eyes closed and be curled up under the covers, but I’m posting on here. Not sure where else to turn. 

Due to my medical bankruptcy and lack of current employment, I don’t have a credit card. Don’t have parents to turn to either. Family is a difficult issue for me. So, I turn to friends and the online network of people. 
Things in life haven’t lined up as hoped, so a little more help is needed. Just a little further.

~Amanda

Posted in creativity, crowdfunding, dreams, emergency, eviction, friends, grad school, life, Personal, storage, transitions, urgent

9/21: post 1: 12 hours before auction #crowdfunding 

Just for safety sake, let’s go with 11am as the deadline. Could things change? Maybe. I’m trying to BEAT the auction, not bid in it. 

What it will cost: $1025+ lock purchase

What I have: $609(as I was typing this, a donation came in. I now have 709)

What it would coat to replace what is replaceable: at least $15,000, bare minimum. 

After this save, I have school funds coming in that can cover the next few months. It just isn’t going to show in time for this week. I just need a little more help. I’m not perfect. I screw up a lot of things. See you when dawn breaks. Maybe a miracle will happen while I’m trying to sleep.

~A

Posted in anxiety, community, crowdfunding, emergency, eviction, faith, friends, homeless, life, Personal, storage, urgent

9/20: Last one… I think (at least for the day… hey look! #crowdfunding)

Total as of 7:20am on 9/21: $749 out of $1025. $276 still needed.

So I’m gonna make this short and sweet for the purpose of crowdfunding in case people don’t wanna hit the donate button for PayPal.

  • No, you don’t need a PP account to send money. Just a credit/debit card.
  • It’s pretty painless. No, really. Granted, your checking account may not agree (neither does mine), but it doesn’t hurt.

So you can click on that button or you can send directly to [greatpenguini333 @ gmail .com] (just remove the spaces and the brackets). The donate button is easier.

Posted in anxiety, bugaboos, cats, crowdfunding, emergency, eviction, faith, friends, grad school, homeless, housing, job hunting, life, Personal, society, storage, transitions, urgent

9/20: Laugh While You Can… At What You Can #crowdfunding still

I’ve learned one thing: Find something to laugh about, even during the darkest times.

So, in my last post, I mentioned Portia was sitting next to me… shortly after that went up, I made the mistake of shifting my body and thus my jar of grape flavored water (that was sitting solidly on my pillow, mind you, no jiggling) tipped and spilled all 24 ounces of water onto my narrow bed, going all the way to the mattress. Yup, I’m one of THOSE people… the ones who just can’t seem to get shit going right.

I guess I needed to flip the poor mattress anyway. Everything else went into the basement for laundry. Tonight. I have nothing else to sleep on or under. And this room gets a smidge chilly in the ev- well anytime really… but worse at night. There’s a reason I’m wearing layers of warm clothes even during a heatwave… this room is cold.

Yes, I’m frustrated with myself for it. I spaced on the fact that the water was still there. But I’m also laughing at myself over it. I have to. It’s a survival mechanism. I taught it to my dad while we were dealing with my mother’s Alzheimer’s… and I use it to deal with the super-shitty year I’ve had. Being homeless sucks… no matter how your situation is, whether you have friends to stay with like me, or you have a tent or are in a long term shelter… it sucks. The tension, feeling of not knowing how or when you’re going to finally land on your feet… it’s hell. And when you have a dependent, whether it’s a child or a pet, it gets even harder.

I hold onto the things of my life, my past, and my hopeful future… much of which is in storage. It’s all I have left. Hence why I’m trying to save it.

~A

Posted in cats, chronic pain, community, crowdfunding, emergency, homeless, housing, life, Personal, storage, urgent

9/20: The Love of a Cat

**I have no magic words. I only have a request. I can ply you with free books.**

I’ve had cats all my life, but growing up, they were strictly outdoors (unless someone slipped in “accidentally”). Then, in 2003, I adopted JoJo and then Jack six weeks after her. Jack passed away in 2010, acute renal failure. JoJo, congestive heart failure earlier this year, right after my eviction process started. After Jack died, I adopted Portia. She is currently curled up next to me on the rollaway bed I’ve been sleeping on for 6 months at a friend’s house.

She is what keeps me going every day. Through physical therapy, headaches, job searches, doctor visits, back pain, and all kinds of other things. She isn’t exactly a young cat herself, as she’ll be 12 in October. She has her moments. She loves having her mane combed, but anything else? HA! She tries to draw my blood. She’s a goofy, gorgeous, silly old lady.

To be fair to both myself and to her, I never -in a million years- expected life to hit me this hard. I thought I’d be able to bounce back up quickly. I never wanted to stay where I am this long. But here we both are. In a room I refer to as the “spa room” due to the indoor (non-working) hot tub and a small sauna that I’m currently using as my closet.

I would love -more than anything- to be sleeping on my own full size mattress in my own apartment again… but I need a good job first and foremost. I also need my stuff safe (you really didn’t think I’d write a post without crowdfunding, did you? You did? Silly you).

As I said at the top, I don’t have any magic words. I can offer free copies of my books in return… although it’ll take me a couple of weeks to get them.

You would be helping Portia and myself to keep our things safe until we can get income once again.

~Amanda

Posted in crowdfunding, emergency, eviction, faith, life, Personal, storage, urgent

9/20: 5th Round: Invisibility in #crowdfunding (still need help #urgent)

If you’re on Facebook, you’ve probably seen the memes/posts that are basically guilt trips. “Share how we met…. one word about our friendship… click like and then share this…” Mind you, I hate those things. But sometimes I wonder if people see the posts I put up beyond the shared memes and articles.

I know this isn’t for some lifesaving thing. My life and family history is in that storage unit. I’m merely asking for a little more help. Sometimes I feel like I’m jumping up and down, shouting from the rooftops…. amidst hundreds, if not thousands, of others who also need a little help.

I do feel invisible at times. Not just with crowdfunding, but in so many other arenas in life. I always have. I just need a little visibility and a little more help before noon tomorrow.

The auction is at Noon, 9/21. I need to pay before then. I have a little over $600 ($609, I think), and I need a total of $1025. Just $400 more… and change… Every bit helps. 

~Amanda

Posted in activism, anxiety, bugaboos, chronic pain, crowdfunding, emergency, family, health, homeless, life, medical, Personal, politics, storage, urgent

9/20: Round 3: #Healthcare, ##GrahamCassidy & #crowdfunding Life

Yes, still on the non-violent warpath to get storage covered before auction. As of this post, I have $609 and need to hit a total of 1025 (plus yet another damn lock, which is $15 or so) before Noon Thursday the 21st…. tomorrow. Preferably today before 6pm Pacific (3.5 hours) so I can sleep easier. So a little over $400 needed. Small donations, large donations… I’m not gonna be picky. I don’t expect any one person to cover the rest… but any little bit helps.


While I am merely crowdfunding to keep my belongings safe from auction while I’m homeless, others out there have to do the same for things like medical and vet bills. Vet bills, I can understand as pet insurance isn’t a huge thing still… and past a certain age of the pet, you can’t get it (at least what I looked at years ago). It isn’t required and it is somewhat affordable. Human healthcare, however, is not affordable. And now, here in the U.S., it is a requirement.

Only now, for the umpteenth time in less than 12 months, the GOP is trying to yank our coverage out from under our collective feet. They’re like the little kid who refuses to listen to “mom” and not put their toys in the microwave and setting it for 10 minutes.

Fool me once, shame on me; fool me twice, shame on YOU. 

Why? Why do they do this? Because they can and because it was “that black dude” us Liberals voted into office for two terms who got the ACA passed. Is the ACA perfect? No. Was Obama perfect? No. But when it came to a number of things, he still did a lot better than the GOP is now. The latest bill to repeal the ACA and kill off American Citizens access to coverage for millions of people. GOP Cruelty at it’s finest ugliest.

If we had the money, I say we form our own superpac or similar and lobby the ever-loving shit out of them, luring them away from Big Pharma (who does some good, but not as much as they’d like us to think), billionaires, and the like. I get it, they want to keep their money. But they’re risking the lives of those who do pay their taxes.

I have a say in this. While my senators are working to fight the GOP insanity, there are too many who don’t listen to their citizens.

One of my many health issues right now is cluster(fuck) headaches. Not much can be done for them and even narcotic pain meds weren’t very effective at even knocking the pain down more than a notch or two on the pain scale. So I was frustrated. It renders me unable to do much of anything. Doctor on Monday suggested oxygen therapy. I had no clue if it would work. At that moment, the pain was lower, so I didn’t bother. But it returned with a vengeance shortly after and I went back yesterday to try it.

It fucking helped. The pain went from a 9 down to a 3 and then I was able to take Aleve (I have prescription strength at 500mgs) and knock it down completely. I still have a few twinges of pain here and there. Now comes the hard part: Getting my insurance (OHP+/Medicaid) to cover a tank for home therapy. The doctor/clinic will be going to bat for me and hopefully get it covered. I had wondered why I never heard of this option before. I thought that maybe it was a new thing. But then I looked it up. Nope. They’ve known about this since the 1930’s. Holy shit.

A friend of mine from the UK said it’s used over there and is one of the first things tried. That’s when it hit me: Big Pharma. Like I said above, they do a lot of good. I’m pro-vaccine, etc… just got my flu shot even… but this is my theory about why this therapy isn’t offered. Pharmaceutical companies would rather you be pumped full of their drugs first. Oxygen therapy isn’t lucrative, after all.

So, back to crowdfunding and the financial burden of human healthcare…

I had sub-sub-sub-par health insurance back in 2008 when I landed in the hospital with Cellulitis. After it was all said and done, and after my bone-break a year later (patella… that was fun to explain to the doctors), I was over $60K in debt. JUST medical debt. I had about $5K in consumer debt… I ended up filing for bankruptcy in 2013. I had to. There were no other options.

When the only options if your uninsured or underinsured are bankruptcy or crowdfunding, the immediate future looks dreary. There’s no way I could have crowdfunded 60K. Not a chance in Hell. Changing my name and moving to Ecuador sounded really good there for a while. But I stayed.

I have a friend who live in an assisted/independent care facility. Her fiance moved in and then was diagnosed with a form of dementia. They moved into an Assisted unit, but his dementia is already beyond what they can do. They were not going to get married because it affected certain financial and medical insurance arrangements, but now that he’s in a different facility, they will be. There are a vast number of reasons why, but I won’t go into them here. The reason I do mention their story is that for two people in need of a senior facility, being legally married should never have a negative impact on their Medicare or Disability.


I’ve seen rallying cries of “Medicare for ALL!” recently. Here’s my take and then I’ll go on my merry way. I watched from a distance as my father struggled with caring for my mother in her last weeks. Hospice had been set up, but they struggled to find a bed for her. After weeks of home care and searching, a bed was finally procured in a facility where they lived (and where I grew up). She was admitted on a Sunday or Monday. On Wednesday, my dad was informed that, DESPITE BEING AT END OF LIFE, she would be discharged Saturday because MEDICARE only covered 6-7 days. My dad, the doctor, and a few others scrambled to get my mother on Medicaid (Medical, technically, as they were in CA) in time. They got it Friday. She passed away a few days later.

I don’t agree with “Medicare for All” mostly for that issue. I say expand MedicAID, include some of the good parts of Medicare, and make it one giant Single-Payer service. Cut the insurance companies out, except for possibly dental and other secondary services (vision, for example).


This is one of my longest posts yet. I don’t normally go over 1000 words on here. But medical care is a big issue with me. And the GOP want to take mine away. The very coverage that handles my dental, my physical therapy (when needed), women’s services, medications that I couldn’t otherwise afford but help me function, and the list goes on.

Call your senators, especially if they’re GOP. Help them understand who is really getting hurt with this mess. Let them know that their constituents refuse to be silenced.

~A