Posted in bugaboos, community, crowdfunding, depression, dreams, faith, grad school, homeless, life, Personal, society

4/17: Response

Earlier this evening someone wrote a comment to a previous post. I could approve the comment (I won’t) or go rip into this person who shall remain nameless. Here’s the thing: this person does not know me. I have their email, which I searched for and found their name. I don’t know this person. From here on out, I’ll speak to them… the rest of you can just read along.


You don’t know me as well as you think you do. Do we have some things in common? Yeah. But you don’t know me. Despite the fact that you’ve been supposedly following my blog for the better part of a year, you clearly haven’t read everything. First, I started grad school in 2014. Since I started, I have done my damnedest to kick ass on my classwork while also working and job hunting. I am now almost done with school. I have two papers to finish off an Incomplete, and then the single credit Capstone this summer, which is really putting my best work from school up on a preformatted website. Not massively time consuming. I am almost done. I am not… I will not… hell, I refuse to listen to people who tell me to give up on school. If you knew me… really knew me… you would know how far I’ve come and how close I am to completion. And no, unless you’re paying my tuition, you don’t have a say in whether I should continue school.

Now, the other bone to pick with your comment: work/job hunting. I actually have applied for some retail jobs. The problem is that I physically cannot do them anymore. I cannot stand for more than half an hour without pain. I have more injuries than you would likely comprehend. If you actually knew me, you would know that. You would also know that I’ve been using my cane more and more lately due to my knee having problems… again. And please, spare me the crap about them accommodating those with disabilities. Been there, done that…. made things worse. Also, just an FYI: those jobs that you deem so plentiful? They don’t pay worth shit. Can you live on $10/hour? Didn’t think so.

I have pushed myself harder than you could begin to imagine. Yes, I’ve had to ask for help at times. I hate asking. I would prefer being completely independent. I’ve applied for jobs across the spectrum, even a few I knew I likely couldn’t do due to my physical issues. But I applied anyway. No calls, no emails, no interviews. I’m not looking for a “perfect job” because I’m not delusional and I know damn well a ‘perfect job’ doesn’t exist. But something where I can use my training and background, as well as a decent LIVING WAGE, and not be in pain…. that’s all I want.

My Master’s Degree I’m almost done with? That’s a career degree. Nothing “pie in the sky” about it.

You don’t know jack shit about me. If you did, you’d have known better than to belittle me and my goals and the work I’ve done to get to where I am. No, my life isn’t where I’d like it to be at this exact moment. This challenge, like every other instance in my life, is one I take on and will learn from. Your comment insulted my intelligence. It insulted my tenacity. But it’s people just like you -those who tell me to ‘just get any job’ or give up on something I’ve worked for- that I’ll leave in the dust.

Stop pretending that you know me. You can’t begin to fathom who I am. And you will never come close to knowing the real me. Go back under your rock. Stop bringing others down.

A community is supposed to come together and help each other in times of need. But I guess you don’t care much about anyone but yourself.

Don’t bother crafting a reply. It, like your original comment, will go into the s*am folder.

~Amanda

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Creative Geek Of All Trades. Do you really need me to explain that one?