SHARE ME!!!! Pwease?
… unless my insomnia decides to kick into gear and I end up with some late night WTF posts that’ll make you all question my sanity (unless you were already doing that, then just carry on). I’m back over on the Vostro (that had a bad battery, so it was acting up… battery gone). I’ll do a post about Jack later…. like, tomorrow.
I started this blog to just let me be my weird self. One step beyond FB, more words than Twitter, and I can share it with Tumblr as well. I have other blogs, but this is the one that gets the most
abuse. I’m open about so much of my life…. there are a few things, such as details about my past sexual assaults, that I leave out. I would hope people who read me understand why.
I’m one of those people who wonders if I’m a test guinea pig for God’s experiments and other things He wants to toss at humans (if pigs do start flying, that wasn’t my fault, I swear). I’ve been through a lot of shit in my life and sometimes, like now, I wonder if things will truly get better. I need to finish school, find work and get more help for my PTSD and a few other things. If I’d known that what I was dealing with with PTSD from those assaults, I would have sought help for it long ago… I guess I tried to forget too hard.
I’m human. I’m damaged but not broken. I’ve dealt with pain of all kinds. But I’m still here. Where ‘here’ is, I don’t know if I can define it right now. I have some physical pain flaring up that is messing with me… so I may be even foggier than usual. I hate asking for help, as I’ve always been the one who wanted to fly solo, to not have to depend on others…. and yet this is where I’ve been stuck for most of the past year and a half. I want to get “surviving” down and move up the ladder to “thriving.” I know I’ll get there… somehow…. I just need help from my community to get there.
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