I look at W3Schools and other sites that explain SQL…. I look through the Powerpoint slides from the class…. it all looks -I don’t know- easy? But then I go to the assignments and it doesn’t seem so easy. I’m way behind on everything.
This summer has felt strange for me. I think the stress of finances, cramming my practicum hours, dealing with health stuff…. it’s all taking its toll. The summer term is short as it is, but it really has felt like one gigantic blur for me. Weeks fly by and so do the assignments and discussions…. and now here I am trying to make sense of it. I finally figured out the way into the remote desktop…. a trick that isn’t in the instructions given.
When I’ve said in the past that I’m tired… it’s an exhaustion across all aspects of my life. It affects everything and is especially hitting my schooling pretty hard. I’ve barely been surviving. This class is an elective and I could’ve taken something lighter… but going into archives, I thought learning database design would be highly useful.
Instead, I feel lost. Nothing makes sense. Nothing seems real. I love what I do and what I’m studying for. But there is still that feeling of being lost in the woods of graduate school and no clear path out of the darkness. I know I’m almost done…. but I’m flailing here….
Blargh…. dragon down…. trying to figure out how to get back up.